"the life of our mission is people"

It must have been kind of disappointing. I was in a posting-frenzy, and then nothing for weeks. Sorry guys.

I'm in my new apartment now, and there's still no internet..so that's partly why.

I'm alive. Been very busy with moving, helping visiting teams, hanging out with our people, just a lot of things. It's been hot at night, sometimes too hot to sleep, so that's been taking a lot of my energy. Busyness + lack of sleep.

I had a good time with a visiting team from Ukraine, we went downtown to talk with the street kids and beggars. We gave them sandwiches and just spent some time with them. It was really great. Also, not so great but still exciting, I said goodbye to my friend who is moving with her family to Rwanda. I'm just excited for her to be there, and excited that maybe I could go visit her there! I really want to! Today went to an orphanage with the team from Ukraine, it's good because I was just there a few weeks ago and the kids still remember me. Building relationships. Went to a Georgian party last night: the owners of the house that Marina and I were living in before, returned. And so the neighbors, whom I befriended during my time there, had a party. I helped to make khinkali!! It was pretty fun too. Tomorrow we (Marina + kids and me) are going to Gardabani to help Diana (YWAM staff+friend) with their kid's program at their church. It's the first meeting (not ever, but the first one in a long time) and so hopefully that will be good too.

I'm learning a lot about having real faith. Persevering in relationship (sometimes making steps towards that and sometimes making mistakes (voluntary, usually) away from that...but definitely learning about the topic and hoping to see some victory soon!). Just getting more established here in YWAM Tbilisi and in what I'm doing. Building some new ideas for what I'd like to do/what God will call me to do, in the future. I realized that this was happening (this establishment) a few weeks ago, and I had this picture of like a tree putting it's roots down, and then remembered Psalm 1. "Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers." I want to be like that, in what I'm doing here in Georgia. My roots are going down (at least for now) and I want them to be planted by God's stream so that I bear fruit because of God's power through me and in me. Of course, I wish I could paint that word picture more beautifully (it's a little more detailed than that in my head) but I hope you understand.

So, this is my life.

"The life of our mission is people."

our GLORY

Jeremiah 2: 11 b-13, "...But My people have changed their Glory for what does not profit. Be astonished, O heavens, at this, and be horribly afraid; Be very desolate,' says the LORD. 'For My people have committed two evils: They have forsaken Me, the fountain of living waters, and hewn themselves cisterns--broken cisterns that can hold no water."

When I first read this this morning, I had like all of this stuff I wanted to say...but now I'm not sure. I think it really speaks for itself. It's such an incredible word-picture. We have forsaken God (the fountain of living waters) for other gods (cisterns, tanks-that don't produce water, and can hold no water). At least, that is my interpretation. If you have another, I would love to hear it!! You should read Jeremiah 2 and reflect via comments. :-) But yeah, I'm not sure all of the context and what Jeremiah is exactly describing, but it talks a lot about turning to other gods and the worthlessness of it all.

This is a good video that's kind of of related to that. Watch it and let me know what you think. Just to let you know, it gets a little intense toward the end.

LORD, please strengthen us (and hear the prayers of our hearts).

light camping

The LORD is my light and salvation, whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life, whom shall I fear?
When evil men advance,
When enemies attack,
Though war is breaking out,
Even then I will be confident.
The LORD is my light and salvation, whom shall I fear?

This is a psalm that I made into a song (I guess they already were songs), and I'm sort of trying to make a few songs out of different parts of it. So, here's part one. You can click on the link to go to my music page and listen if you'd like to!

Psalm 27 (part 1)

I'm "camping" right now. I use that word subjectively because I have electricity in my tent (which means a lamp and a computer), there's wireless internet all over the campground, I'm 15 steps away from bathrooms with running water and showers, and my parents are sleeping 10 feet away in an RV equipped with most things you'd have at home. So you know what I mean.

But hey, I'm not complaining.

A quick change of topic: I'm struggling with ME. I'm so focused on myself and my problems and struggles and weaknesses and worries, that I'm forgetting other people, and losing concern for them, and not be very actively loving. I don't want to be like that! Life is about relationships. It's not good how easy it is to get caught up in the constant race for more, and lose the right priorities. How many of you understand me?! LORD, please free me from myself.

I'll be here until Monday.

Oh, by the way: 21 days.

the new and the old

I had a really good quiet time this morning. It was the first time in a long time that I've been able to organize my thoughts in a concise and meaningful way. A lot of my journal entries lately (maybe similar to many of my blog entries lately) have been really random and NOT to the point, always skirting around the edge. But it was really relieving/satisfying to be able to "sort it out" on a page.

And this is one of my thoughts that I began to realize. When I finished DTS, I was all for living as the "new Jenni" and not the "old Jenni". And when I came back to the States, I was all for it, and terribly afraid of falling into my old ways. I did. And that's why I need a Redeemer. But that's not my main point here. My main point is that after a while, even the new becomes old.

Even the new becomes old.

My first evening back at home (April 20th)

God is not taking me through all that I've been going through these past 3 months, so that I can be the person I was 3 months ago. He wants me to be more holy. More refined. More like Him. And I need to be striving for that. If I thought my post-DTS attitude/character/life was good, then I'd better expect that God is going to do even better things...because He is STILL working on me.

And I'm trying to get a good grip on Him.