the good, the bad...and the nephew

I just spent the last 5 days in Ephrata.. it was good and bad.

GOOD because:

I got to see my parents after like 10 months of not seeing them! And they re-did my room and I really like it, it's really pretty! I saw lots of people that I've missed. I got a haircut and stuff.

BAD because:

It's really hard to be in a foreign country, have so much of your life and your heart transformed, and then come back to the place where you grew up. It's a crazy thing, I really do not know how to explain it. And also just the way that I deal with culture shock. It's like I can go into all of the places, like Walmart and see everything and be "okay". But then I'll be getting ready to go to bed and I will feel like my world is going to implode or I'm just going to die or something. It's kind of rough.

But God is SUPER true to His word, when He says that He will answer us when we cry out to Him. It's true, really.

My nephew, Trevor. He's grown SO much since the last time I saw him.

write, dance, fear... PURE

This morning I woke up with this huge desire to write a new post in this blog of mine, but now I can't remember why. I must have had something good I wanted to say, so maybe I will just write and eventually it will come out.

So I've been home for 3 days. But it sort of feels like longer. Not in a bad way though, I'm actually having a really great time! I've seen quite a few of my friends and we've really had a lot of fun. The other night we sort of had a dance party. Yeah, we did all the really hip songs like, "Pharaoh, Pharaoh" and "I'm Trading My Sorrows". Pretty exciting. And last night some friends were over and we had a really great time playing games and throwing a football and everything. I'm really loving it so far.

But, one of my secret fears is that I'm going to hit a wall. Meaning, that I'm going to be having a great time, yay!...and then BAM. I'm like depressed. Or something bad is going to happen, and everything is going to be not so great. And I really don't want that to happen. And I ESPECIALLY don't want to be worried that it's going to happen, because I know that it will distract me from living here and now.

Just now I was thinking: something that is so beautiful is purity. Whether it's purity in a lake, or in someones skin, or in a food, or in love. And I really like it. It's like gentle and refreshing and calming and exciting at the same time. And I really want to have purity in my love in all of my relationships. And not just me, I want everybody to have purity in their love in all of their relationships. It would change the world. It would change my heart. It would change yours.

And you know, God is wholly PURE. It makes me want to like fly or dance or something. And it's so cool how we can see these little things about His character, even if it's for like only a second that we have a great understanding and then it's gone. It's like a phenomenon or something.

buddies

home

I am home. Well, to one home. I have a home in Georgia now too, you know. I'm not too culture-shocked. Well, at one point I felt a little sick to my stomach (because I was so weirded out) but I am okay now. I really love these people here, so it's good to see them. Really.

So, I missed my flight from New York to Seattle, so I had to stay the night there. But the airport paid for my hotel and food and everything, so it turned out really cool. And I made it to Seattle, and some of my friends greeted me with a sign and balloons and it was really sweet.

Dzalian miqvararian (Actually, I don't remember if that's right or not. Darn, I'm forgetting Georgian ALREADY).

I feel a bit like this...

IWILLOVERCOME : Charlie Hall

I can see that my hands are trembling, I can see that my legs are weak
I can see that my head is spinning, but I will overcome
And I know that my heart is hurting, And I know that my soul it aches
And I know that it seems I'm failing, but I will overcome, I will overcome

O Lord I'm strong in You, O Lord I am wise in You
O Lord I can see in You, so I will overcome
O Lord I'm loved by You, O Lord I am free in you
O Lord I'm complete in You
So I will overcome, I will overcome, I will overcome

God listen to me shout, I'm so far from anywhere and I'm calling out
Lead me, lead me to the rock that is higher than I
You're my breath, You're my breath, You're my very life
Infinite, Holy King meets weak and frail--Christ in me
And I will overcome not by my strength but by Your grace and love...

I felt a lot like this yesterday. I guess I still feel like it a little bit (like the whole "my head is spinning" part...) but God is so faithful to teach us and to help us through the times we aren't sure we're going to make it through. Seriously. And something I need to remember that He really showed me yesterday: GOD IS THE SAME HERE IN GEORGIA AND THERE IN THE USA. And that is a greatly comforting thought.

Now, lets see if I can put all of this stuff He's been showing me inside of my heart and be proactive about it.

TWO DAYS.

konferanse & vind

For some reason, my blogger account is in Russian. It's really strange. I mean, I'm using a Russian guy's computer, but I'm logged into MY account...and it's still in Russian. Really strange man.

Anyways, the conference was really great. We talked about trust. We made a lot of good new friends. And had a lot of fun. We took a couple excursions, one to the land we bought for the base here in Tbilisi and it was REALLY windy. But beautiful. And people prayed for the future of Tbilisi and the significance of the land, so it was really great.

And I made some cool friends. There is an outreach team here, they came to help with the conference. Actually, they were on outreach in Armenia and that's why they came to help (because they were close and people were coming anyways)...but it's turned out to be an incredibly great thing! I'm so glad to have met them, and I we've had some good times! They are from a CREATIVE DTS in Norway, so they're dancers and singers and an artist, and it's really cool! I like them. :-)

I leave for the States in less than a week. I'm excited. But a little afraid. But a little numb because I don't really realize that I'm leaving yet. All I can say is that I'm really grateful that I am coming back, because it helps to not have to finalize everything. Really.

But I think I'm excited. God is doing NEW THINGS. And it's COOL.

I wanted to put a picture, but I couldn't get it to work. But it's okay.

cable-car

THE CABLE-CAR

So, when we were in Khulo this last month, we heard that the cable car had been shut-down.

You want to know why? Because the cable is too weak, and it could break anytime.

This is the same cable car that we went on TWICE just in December. And it's the same cable car that stopped half-way in the middle (did I mention it's like the 2nd highest one in Europe or something) because the power went out--but we didn't know that, we thought we were going to die. Seriously. One girl like instantly fell to the floor because she was so scared. I thought my heart was going to explode out of my chest. Others were like, "oh my goodness...oh my goodness...oh my goodness" and then we started singing worship songs and declaring that we weren't going to die in that cable car. And then a couple minutes later the power came back on and everything was okay.

But I still can't believe they shut it down so soon after we went on. Like, it could have broken with us in it, but it didn't. God protected us and I am really glad. And I'm really glad that nobody else got hurt on it either. SERIOUSLY MAN. :-)

Some pictures from Khulo: December 2006

yay for rubber boots!

villages can make you a little crazy

a bit random

So, someone hacked into my myspace like a day or two ago. And it really makes me wonder why they do it. They just like posted a couple bulletins with advertisements or something. And it was strange. But I changed my password and made it really tricky...so hopefully they won't be able to get in for a little while at least.

I leave Georgia in 10 days. It's coming so soon. But I think it really helps that I know that I am going to be coming back...but still, I know so much is going to change while I'm gone and that's a little weird. But I guess the same thing happened when I left the States. It's all just really strange. But you know, I think that God is really preparing me for coming back (to the States). Just with different situations and stuff. And with different struggles that are coming up all of a sudden. But I really realize that I really need to remember these two things:

HUMILITY and SERVICE

With love covering them both.

inside an orthodox church

Last night I was writing in my journal, and I realized that lately I've been writing a lot of wants (or don't wants). Like: "I want to be ______", or "I don't want to be ______". And I don't know why. Maybe it's so I can remind myself of those things when I look back in my journal later. I hope that it works.

I REALLY WANT TO LOVE PEOPLE.

And last night I had a really strange dream(s). Really.

new--> old--> new--> old--> NEW!...

It's so hard sometimes, to live as new and not as old. But it's so much BETTER to live as new. Even if it feels more comfortable to live as old. How many of you understand me?

Parts of COLOSSIANS 3 (NLT)

Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand...You used to do these things when your life was still part of this world. But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language. Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him. In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us... Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

Khulo & Bodbe

I've been running like crazy.

Khulo was awesome. It really felt like home, people were still welcoming, there was still mud, I wore rubber boots...I loved it. And it was a lot warmer than before, which was nice. We also were able to hand out Operation Christmas Child gifts to some of the kids at one of the schools, and it was really cool. I cried a little bit. And I realized how God really sees all of us the same. With a heck of a lot of love in His heart.

And then this last Saturday we visited an orphanage about 2 1/2 hours away from Tbilisi, called Bodbe. It's specifically for kids with mental disabilities...but there were also a lot of children who were perfectly normal. But I LOVED IT. I cannot explain it to you. The kids were wonderful and loving and warm and I just wanted to like hug them forever. It's not a super-nice place, but the ladies who work there to take care of the kids really love them and it's evident, and I think it does a lot for their (kids) mental state. We played games, talked about the life of Jesus and really gave as much love as we could. I want to go back. I want to take them!

But I've been having a great time.