So many new thought processes going on these days.
Being the person that I want others to be to me? Not in changing my core personality... but for example: I expect and desire forgiveness for my mistakes, but how forgiving am I when people hurt me? I want to experience true acceptance in my relationships, but how accepting am I of the people around me?
Another thought about comparison: I often (like say, 97% of the time) compare myself with everyone in everything. I'm not proud of it, but just acknowledging the current fact. But it really hinders me from appreciating beauty and respecting people. Generally when I'm walking around downtown, I observe the girls. I see one who has nice hair, or a nice figure, cute clothes, etc. and then I think-- but I don't have that? Is she more beautiful than me? What do I have that she doesn't have? How can I get ahead of her in my comparison game?
Please don't be frightened. This is just an honest look into my weaknesses and my process of CHANGE. So much of how I view things is in the process of being re-adjusted. Re-aligned. Re-established. And filled with more and more Truth.
But then I realized, what if I walked around, observed the beauty of the girls around me and acknowledged (honored, appreciated) their beauty without even bringing myself into the picture. Just acknowledge, honor, appreciate her beauty and in that way give glory to God because He is the Artist and what He designs is good.
I'm really beginning to believe that there is so much happiness in honoring, respecting, loving, giving out to other people: more than receiving ourselves.
"Stuff my dad never told me about RELATIONSHIPS" is a super interesting book (well, so far at least) and it talks in detail about this. The "flow" of giving out. Of finding unconditional love not by seeking for it, but by giving it out to others. Finding value not in seeking it, but in valuing others. Very interesting stuff.
Being the person that I want others to be to me? Not in changing my core personality... but for example: I expect and desire forgiveness for my mistakes, but how forgiving am I when people hurt me? I want to experience true acceptance in my relationships, but how accepting am I of the people around me?
Another thought about comparison: I often (like say, 97% of the time) compare myself with everyone in everything. I'm not proud of it, but just acknowledging the current fact. But it really hinders me from appreciating beauty and respecting people. Generally when I'm walking around downtown, I observe the girls. I see one who has nice hair, or a nice figure, cute clothes, etc. and then I think-- but I don't have that? Is she more beautiful than me? What do I have that she doesn't have? How can I get ahead of her in my comparison game?
Please don't be frightened. This is just an honest look into my weaknesses and my process of CHANGE. So much of how I view things is in the process of being re-adjusted. Re-aligned. Re-established. And filled with more and more Truth.
But then I realized, what if I walked around, observed the beauty of the girls around me and acknowledged (honored, appreciated) their beauty without even bringing myself into the picture. Just acknowledge, honor, appreciate her beauty and in that way give glory to God because He is the Artist and what He designs is good.
I'm really beginning to believe that there is so much happiness in honoring, respecting, loving, giving out to other people: more than receiving ourselves.
"Stuff my dad never told me about RELATIONSHIPS" is a super interesting book (well, so far at least) and it talks in detail about this. The "flow" of giving out. Of finding unconditional love not by seeking for it, but by giving it out to others. Finding value not in seeking it, but in valuing others. Very interesting stuff.
"This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother's were righteous....
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers..." 1 John 3:11-12, 16
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers..." 1 John 3:11-12, 16
2 comments:
Well, I think it's pretty natural to compare yourself with other people. I wouldn't be so quick to jump to the conclusion that it's unhealthy or sinful. The point where those comparisons become bad is when you do harmful and destructive things to yourself and to others in order to gain those qualities you covet. But for the most part, I think internal comparisons to the world around us is a pretty natural, biological thing. Don't be surprised if you can't turn it off!! But as you said, honoring those people by admiring their beauty is part of the healthy comparison. I too do a lot of comparing and I think you might find that pretty much everyone else does too (even the guys). We're all just that aware of our world around us. Sometimes comparing ourselves to others can help us understand how we fit in to our niche and where we may be lacking in our own self growth. :)
On the point about wanting someone else's figure (me too!), my advice would be to stay away from the puri! :) Not that I would be capable of doing that if I were in your situation... lol
Kortney! What's up girl?!
I do agree with you and believe there are good comparisons (although, I might choose another word for it... but I'm not sure which one exactly...) that spur us on to Goodness or inspire us to grow. And I'm so totally down for that!
But I see in myself much of the negative comparison. Where, out of jealousy or my own feelings of insufficiency, I cut people down. Most of the time the whole process stays in my heart. But even then, it eventually flows out into my actions in some form or another.
This is what dissatisfies me. This is what makes me feel that I'm not respecting people. And I think that that is unhealthy. But at the same time, you're right-- I don't want to make some unrealistic or idealistic goal that I can't achieve, or that is not even being required of me.
But I don't know the answer/solution to that yet. I'm still on the learning-journey, eh! And I'm open for life-wisdom from above. :-) I'm also on the becoming-a-more-confident-person journey, so much of this could be linked to that as well.
Anyways, I really appreciate your feedback and I'm always ready to hear what you have to say, my friend! :-)
And you are SO right about the puri.
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