pre-trip commentary #2

On Wednesday nights, me and a few girls meet and have sort of an accountability group. But recently we decided to start reading a book together, so we chose, "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow. I've only read the first chapter, but so far I really like it! In the book, there is a story about 2 monks that I especially liked, so I'm going to share it:

"I need oil," said an ancient monk, so he planted an olive sapling. "Lord," he prayed, "it needs rain that its tender roots may drink and swell. Send gentle showers." And the Lord sent gentle showers. "Lord," prayed the monk, "my tree needs sun. Send sun, I pray thee." And the sun shone, gilding the dripping clouds. "Now frost, my Lord, to brace its tissues," cried the monk. And behold, the little tree stood sparkling with frost but at evening it died. Then the monk sought the cell of a brother monk, and told his strange experience. "I, too, planted a little tree," he said, "and see! It thrives well. But I entrust my tree to its God. He who made it knows better what it needs than a man like me. I laid no condition. I fixed not ways or means. 'Lord, send what it needs,' I prayed, 'storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. Thou hast made it and Thou dost know.' "

I would totally write my little commentary on that, but I think the story really speaks for itself. It leaves a lot to think about, and I really like that!

So, some good news: my plane ticket is bought and paid for (for the most part--just waiting for the bank to officially clear the purchase on my debit card). Who would have though? I mean, seriously.

And a little more good news! I've finally realized that I need to live for today. I mean, I've known that for a long time, but in light of this trip and DTS and everything, I've been SUPER focused on the future. It's like I've been forgetting that each day when I wake up, God has a specific purpose for me. Knowing that I have the opportunity each day to please my Savior, gives me much hope! I only have 53 days left here, I need to remember that.

*"Never dwell on tomorrow--remember that [tomorrow] is God's, not our's."
(a line from "Daily Strength For Daily Needs" but actually a line from "Calm My Anxious Heart"!)

pre-trip commentary #1

So, I leave in like 55 days. Woah. I wish I had a lot of pre-trip things to write here, but I don't really! I think it's because I think about it all so much that I just can't put it into words...if that makes sense. I guess I can write a little bit.

God just keeps proving to me over and over and over again that He wants me to go on this. At least I think that's what it is all about. I mean, for example:

Yesterday morning, I was praying. And I really wanted to ask God if I could just maybe please get a support letter back (financial support!) that day. Just for confirmation and encouragement and such, because I hadn't gotten one for a few days. But, then I felt like that's just not something that I can ask God. "Oh please send me money." But then, He brought the verse from Matthew to mind which says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." (7:7-8) After I thought about that, I just had a peace with asking. A peace that it would be okay, and that I can ask something like that. Especially since it wasn't out of greed or anything, it was just more for confirmation and encouragement, like I said. So anyway, the day goes by and mail-time comes. I got a check, and it was for $300! It just blew me away that God knew a few days ago that I would ask that question, and so He prompted a certain person at a certain time so that my "request" (I guess that's what you'd call it) could be fulfilled. God is so good, and such an amazing planner.

There still are some struggles too, but at the same time I think I'm really learning what it means to really trust Him. I just hope that it is information that I retain!