It's so hard to trust sometimes. I wish it weren't, but it really is. And it's funny... it's a lot easier to tell people that they need to trust God-- but then to actually do it myself is a lot harder.
Or it feels like I'm letting go of what I can't control and trusting, but then in a wave of emotion it hits me again and I'm knocked to the ground (this is what I feel like).
I just don't really know how to come to grips with the fact that I'm an incredibly emotional person. I know that God made me that way, and I want to be able to embrace that, but it so controls me a lot more than I'd like it to, and THAT I don't know what to do with.
I don't like that I get pulled around by how I feel, but how do I change it so that my emotions can help me and not hurt me?
I have a lot of questions.
The Bible Course is going pretty good. We have quite a bit of homework. We have a book of the Bible that we study for a week, and we do a lot of different things with that, looking up historical information, trying to understand the context more through various means. Also one day a week we are reading the Bible out loud. We'll read through almost the whole Bible out loud by the end of the 3 months.
Holland is still great. I think that I definitely have fallen in love with the beautiful nature! Every morning I ride through the forest to go to class... how amazing is that. I love it very much.
Also, I've started helping out with worship a little bit on the base. It's fun to get involved. But I notice too that I miss being involved in ministries-- I miss my street kids and my street people!!
But I'm glad to be where I am and I'm trying to embrace the day, eh.
Or it feels like I'm letting go of what I can't control and trusting, but then in a wave of emotion it hits me again and I'm knocked to the ground (this is what I feel like).
I just don't really know how to come to grips with the fact that I'm an incredibly emotional person. I know that God made me that way, and I want to be able to embrace that, but it so controls me a lot more than I'd like it to, and THAT I don't know what to do with.
I don't like that I get pulled around by how I feel, but how do I change it so that my emotions can help me and not hurt me?
I have a lot of questions.
The Bible Course is going pretty good. We have quite a bit of homework. We have a book of the Bible that we study for a week, and we do a lot of different things with that, looking up historical information, trying to understand the context more through various means. Also one day a week we are reading the Bible out loud. We'll read through almost the whole Bible out loud by the end of the 3 months.
Holland is still great. I think that I definitely have fallen in love with the beautiful nature! Every morning I ride through the forest to go to class... how amazing is that. I love it very much.
Also, I've started helping out with worship a little bit on the base. It's fun to get involved. But I notice too that I miss being involved in ministries-- I miss my street kids and my street people!!
But I'm glad to be where I am and I'm trying to embrace the day, eh.
1 comment:
"You can only control your life to the degree you can control your emotions."
Not sure who said it, but I agree.
Your emotions will always get the best of you, no matter how good you can be at hiding them.
The best you can do is to understand the shortcoming all us humans have (which fundamentally make us human); the more you are aware of your weaknesses, the more power you will have at identifying them and avoiding potential pitfalls.
But there is also danger in this! People try to obsess over their problems and make them the focal point of their lives. "Defeating the Gorilla," as I call it, gets you nowhere. If you're concentrating on the Gorilla, you'll easily forget the Sheep behind you.
Recognize the Gorilla exists, but put all your energy in feeding the sheep. Things fall into place much easier that way.
God bless you, Jenni, and keep up his work.
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