So, we are in the middle of the 4th week of DTS. It's going really fast, actually. And the newness has kind of worn off and I find myself getting caught up in the "work" instead of putting my heart into it and focusing on Jesus.
For example, last night we were supposed to have a special worship evening. So I was trying to plan, trying to think of a good creative idea, was having a bit of hard time thinking of something that I thought was cool enough. Then I talked to Korinne on the phone to get some more ideas, and she said something like, 'just remember we want to do something to get them to focus on the amazing things God is doing and has done and to be grateful to Him for that...' and I can honestly say, that I had forgotten that purpose in my planning. Like, of course it was in the back of my mind, but I was more concerned about the night and how it looked and went, then about encouraging them to praise God for what He is doing...
Just a small confession. But after that realization, the evening went pretty well. We had some time to reflect on how our lives have changed for the better and on the blessings that we've seen, and we were able to share together and praise God for those things. And also confess before God the areas where we have been ungrateful. Then we had some song-singing time and it was great too, we really had fun. So, I'm grateful for that.
But I'm constantly seeing how I totally cannot be a leader without the wisdom and love and everything that flows out of relationship with God. And I'm really seeing the power of the words, "Lord, I can't do this without You... please, YOU be the leader." And I'm seeing that just work without the Spirit of God involved produces mediocre things. And I want more than mediocre.
And I'm continuing to learn.
For example, last night we were supposed to have a special worship evening. So I was trying to plan, trying to think of a good creative idea, was having a bit of hard time thinking of something that I thought was cool enough. Then I talked to Korinne on the phone to get some more ideas, and she said something like, 'just remember we want to do something to get them to focus on the amazing things God is doing and has done and to be grateful to Him for that...' and I can honestly say, that I had forgotten that purpose in my planning. Like, of course it was in the back of my mind, but I was more concerned about the night and how it looked and went, then about encouraging them to praise God for what He is doing...
Just a small confession. But after that realization, the evening went pretty well. We had some time to reflect on how our lives have changed for the better and on the blessings that we've seen, and we were able to share together and praise God for those things. And also confess before God the areas where we have been ungrateful. Then we had some song-singing time and it was great too, we really had fun. So, I'm grateful for that.
But I'm constantly seeing how I totally cannot be a leader without the wisdom and love and everything that flows out of relationship with God. And I'm really seeing the power of the words, "Lord, I can't do this without You... please, YOU be the leader." And I'm seeing that just work without the Spirit of God involved produces mediocre things. And I want more than mediocre.
And I'm continuing to learn.
1 comment:
Jenni, I love you, but He loves you even more especially when we confess when we mess up,repent, learn, and move on to be more like Him. That is such a perfect prayer, we can all learn from what you lived out. I praise God for you and your heart, for being moldable even when we want to stick in our heels and say no, yet He has a way of turning our hearts back to Him and His ways! I look forward to reading your blog and check it often even if I don't leave a comment. Gro n go!
Post a Comment